Monday, April 2, 2012

B is for Battle of the Bad Asses

Voldemort vs...

There's been a lot of talk about Voldemort vs. Vader, but here's the thing: Vader wasn't the real evil.

I mean, look at this mug, does this say evil?

Episode I took away my manhood

On the other hand, a young Tom Riddle makes me feel small just looking at him. Seriously, I'm scared to be a muggle just looking at the picture.

Feel as pathetic as you are under my glare!
And because these are so much fun, here's another for you.

I hate you Obi Wan! I hate that you make me go to a school
that won't let me have a girlfriend or dye my hair black! You're
ruining my life!
So who is a worthy adversary for Voldemort?

Emperor Palpatine!

Look, it's a skin condition caused by Evil. I'm not the only
one suffering from it..

Wait, are you saying I'm ugly? 

Now, I'll avoid picking sides (cough...Voldemort...cough). I'll simply provide the facts:

  • Sith Lord, makes the universe evil
  • Evil Magical ruler on Earth
  • Can only have one Sith henchmen at a time
  • Has an army of magical henchmen
  • Electrical powers shoot out of his fingers
  • Has a pet snake that can eat people.
  • Can wield a light saber. Basically a super heated sword.
  • Wields a wand. Capable of enacting endless magical spells.
  • Death Grip
  • Avanda Kadavra
  • Dies and stays dead
  • Dies and comes back once

There are many more factors to be considered, but I've made this post long enough.

Who do you think would win?

What other points are to be made in this battle?

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